I remember watching the moon landing on the small black & white TV in my parents’ bedroom, I sensed my dad’s excitement, but I had no understanding of the enormity of the event. More recently, I’ve been awed by the stunning images of outer space being transmitted by the James Webb telescope. To me, space feels so “out there and full of nothing,” but those bright images were so full of life and light that it gave me a new perspective on space.
My horse, Bentley, feels safer when he’s close to me than when he’s further away. However, as a very large horse who frequently has “up” energy, *I* feel safer if he’s at least an arm’s length away from me. It sets up a conflict between us when I need more space and he needs less.
Doing some groundwork, my request was for him to walk and then trot with me in the arena. He was fine maintaining that arm’s length distance at the walk, but when I asked for a trot, his emotions came up a bit and he got too close for comfort to me.
I moved away. He moved closer again. Before I knew it, we were only using a tiny bit of the arena and I felt squished. I was nervous about this ½ ton horse and his very hard feet being so close to mine.
I realized that he was either ignoring or not hearing my request for more space. We stopped and I reached my arms out as far as they would go so I could get really *feel* how much space I was asking for between us. The next time we went off together, I focused on feeling this space more than anything else. I had to occupy it energetically, mentally, emotionally.
He still wanted to be closer, but my boundary was clear, calm and unwavering. It took him a few seconds to figure out what I was communicating and then he relaxed into a lovely, soft trot and held his own space.
The concept of “space” is an one I’ve been pondering lately.
Whether it’s playing with a horse, an extended visit from a friend, or being afraid to express to family who I *really* am, I am seeing these from a lens of “taking up space.”
- How much is too much? What’s too little? How do I know?
- How do I figure out the “right” amount of space for the situation.
- What does *the right amount” even mean?
This is my series of 21 stories and insights of my space exploration. I hope you’ll find something of value for your own life as I explore the uncharted depths of “inner space.”
I welcome your comments, thoughts and feedback if you care to play with me.
