MANURE MEDITATIONS BLOG
I do most of my best thinking while I’m cleaning stalls or working on the pasture. I’m honored you’ve stopped by to read.
The Myth of Continuous Growth
Several years ago, I met a woman at a networking event who said something that really made me think. I mentioned I was hosting a retreat and she made it clear that she didn’t ever call anything a “retreat” because it implied losing. She followed up with, “After all,...
Redefining Consistency
Consistency is not one of my strong suits. Frankly, I find doing the same thing the same way at the same interval boring. You may have noticed these posts come out at different times of day, on different days, and there are different amounts of time between them. I...
Pressuring Myself
I was so on edge. The pressure had been building for a while. Kids, horses, house, business, bills, groceries, cooking--and all the things that go with all those things. There were a thousand details that needed tending. They ALL felt like priorities that had to be...
When Your Confidence Abandons You
Have you ever been in a situation where you just knew you were 100% prepared? You were confident and ready to go… ...but when it came right down to it, your confidence abandoned you. You didn’t say what you wanted to say. You didn’t say it with the clarity and...
Unlearning Unworthiness
I wasn’t born feeling unworthy. I learned it. I learned it when I was told there was only one right answer--and “that wasn’t it.” I learned it when I heard, “Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.” I learned it at the death of my furry friend when I got...
The Day I Experienced True Self Love
I sat in the chair, arms snuggling my body. Caring for and cradling my body, I realized it was the first time I’d felt genuine love for myself from myself. This was only about 2 years ago and it was kind of a shock, to be honest. Once I had this experience, even...
Impact Ten Years Later…
From 2012-2020, my horses and I worked with a local school district to serve students who needed a bit of a boost. The groups of 8 ranged in age from 4th to 9th grade. Some had experienced “Big T Trauma” and others had challenges that couldn’t be attributed to one...
Why I Don’t Hate “Baby Steps” Any More
It all started a while back in a session where “Stephanie” noticed and paid attention to “the slowest, tiniest movements ever” and the very small shifts that were happening inside her. Those micro movements, which could have felt like “not very much,” actually created...
The Courage to Question: My Vulnerable Exploration of Faith and Doubt
For the last few years I’ve been deconstructing my beliefs around religion. Maybe you’ve been on similar journey. I’ve not been vocal about it because, one, it’s a personal matter and two, I keep hoping I’ll land on an answer. Instead I keep coming up with more...
A Different Kind of Resolution
Happy New Year! Yesterday, I was thinking about my post on darkness and silence and realized I was grieving my sense of peace amongst all the year-end lists and visions for 2024. I’m the first to admit I love shiny, new things but this year, instead of starting the...
The Value of Darkness & Silence
According to the Celtic tradition, today’s Winter Solstice marks the beginning of the New Year. After the longest night has passed, the daylight lasts a little bit longer. Many beautiful things have their beginning in the darkness. I think of the darkness that existed...
It’s Your Greatest Gift
Since our new horse, 8-year-old Sadie, arrived about a month ago it’s been fascinating to observe the shifting herd dynamics. It’s not unlike adding a new person at work, a new kid at school, or a new baby to the family. Relationships naturally shift. And they should....
Day 21: Reclaim the Shame of Being Too Much
I caught up with an old friend the past few days. She wrote a damn good book, but first it pissed me off. It confronted me with some things about myself I didn’t really want to look at. That’s never comfortable. When I told her my initial impression of the book, we...
Swim Practice
My son, Ben, decided to join the swim team in high school. He wasn’t old enough to drive himself to the 6 am practices which meant the job fell to me. The pool was about 20 minutes from campus and he (and his teammates) would need a ride back to school, too. Sitting...
Why We All Need to be More Present
I came across the quote above the other day on Facebook and my heart felt like it was wrapped in a warm blanket. Some believe productivity and presence are mutually exclusive. They’re not. But we make it harder on ourselves than we need to by focusing on productivity...
Forget the Outcome: Input Makes the Difference
Yesterday I uncovered a limiting belief that "I'm a failure if someone else doesn't fulfill their obligations." I can think and rationalize and tell myself this isn't true (because logically, it's not), but that only works until the next time I find myself in a...
Day 20: Space for New Friends
I love meeting amazing women and having deep, powerful conversations. When I received a last-minute invitation to a stunning 5-course meal with 9 strangers, I jumped at the opportunity. I had high expectations of the richness of this evening as I wondered who would be...
Turning a NO into Trust
A couple of years ago I met a horse named Bella at a training. My aim was to develop a relationship with Bella over the course of three days always being mindful of offering her a choice. Would she say YES to connecting? To being haltered? To walking with me at...