Summers in college, I worked on a small, quiet guest ranch in Estes Park,Colorado. The work was very physical with long hours, but I loved it. It doesn’t get much better than getting paid to ride a horse in beautiful country! On a typical day we’d spend as much as 6 hours riding through Roosevelt National Forest or in the shadow of the Mummy Range.
I was the only female wrangler they’d ever hired. It was surprised (and delighted) to be promoted to Head Wrangler when my predecessor quit within weeks. It was a big responsibility for this gal who’d only learned a month before the proper way to put on a Western saddle.
We had 30+ horses to feed, saddle and care for. I loved getting to know the personality and quirks of each one. I can still tell you their names and what they were like all these years later.
I ran that barn well. Happy horses, happy wranglers, happy guests.
Each Sunday a new batch of 15-20 folks would arrive. Some were families, some were honeymooners. I was always surprised at how many had never ridded a horse before. At dinner, I got to know how them and their riding ability, then I’d match them with a suitable mount for the week. I held a secret competition with myself to ask their name once– and only once– for the whole time they were there. I called them by their name whenever I saw them to help them feel seen and valued.
Being entrusted with this responsibility gave me a big confidence boost.*I* felt seen and valued and I didn’t have to be coy about my love of horses.
The surrounding felt like being wrapped in strong arms–insulated and protected. As I rode each day to show our guests stunning views, I took in the spaciousness of the landscape.
Going back to college at the end of summer, I realized how much I had changed. In the mountains, I wasn’t worried about what people thought of me. I didn’t have to wear a mask of social acceptability. I discovered an emerging generosity of spirit that I didn’t even know existed.
The mountains are where I first learned how it felt to be fully myself.
These are the questions I wrestling with at the moment. I’m fortunate to get to play with them and my horses and get immediate feedback on how I’m taking up space. They make me be more present an grounded and I gain incredible insight into how to love myself–and others–better. You’re welcome to come play. Shoot me a DM and let’s talk about taking up your space.
(This is the 5th installment of the series Exploring Space: 21 Days of Taking up Too Little, Too Much & the Right Amount)
